A Five Minute Kind Of Day

Today my depression is rearing its ugly head.  I am not very motivated to do all the things on my "internal" list of things to do.  The overcast and cloudy weather is not helping.  We have a funeral to go to -viewing tonite and funeral tomorrow.  Taking the kids for their first funeral, so there will be lots of questions and talk about death.  Thankfully it is a Great Grandma that is not quite as close to them that allows them to experience death for the first time. 

I shudder thinking of when we were just 10, having mom be the one in the casket.

So, maybe some would say, its been 26 years, get on with your life.  Well, I have.  For many years, we didn't talk about my mom or my dad.  Unfortunately that bottled up grief if now being expressed in depression in my life, 26 years later.  I really don't like depression.  It stands in my way.  Stands in the way of getting the things done that blesses my family, and myself. 

It stands in the way of accomplishing dreams and projects. 

I am glad that I am seeing a light at the end of the tunnel - but some days are much worse than others and today is one of them. 

It's days like this that my timer comes in handy.  I am going to set it for 5 minutes and focus on one area.  Then 5 more, 5 more, 5 more until I make some progress.  And I am going to crank the music too.  Hopefully the afternoon will be better than the morning!

Comments

  1. I don't think the weather helps! Day after day of rain and cloudy skies is enough to give anybody the blues. I had trouble being motivated too... I was going to go along with drew's preschool to the zoo but that was postponed... I had the chance to get a lot done but it just didn't happen. I should have tried your 5 minute trick!

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